Is It Time For Viagra ?

In a society filled with all kinds of magic little pills to cure just about anything,side effects aside,of course. I picked up some years ago a whimsical clock which I hung in my kitchen. It is round, neon blue, and keeps very accurate time. The arrows point straight up when they are suppose to with little replicas of that little blue pill on the hands of the clock.
Around it's outside border it asks,"Is It Time For Viagra?"
And so I begin my story of what I, with compassion, call my night with "wet noodle man."
I know, I know... I really shouldn't! But I have to share this experience with all of you both men and women.
The clock I described has been there for a few years now and when noticed gets a chuckle. I had almost forgotten about its cute little marketing logo until one night a month or so ago.
As I have mentioned it seems to me that I am more drawn to younger men and them to me. But after some self analysis I decided to really figure out why that was. I have a nurturing nature and though I admit to having times of being "needy," for the most part I am a strong woman.
I don't like to be controlled. I don't like to control except in some situations which both my kids can very vehemently list for you. I admit to sometimes being a hovering overbearing mama bear type with my kids. I am divorced from their father after all. He distanced himself from them, and the rest of their relatives have died. So, yes, I tend to be too mothering. But I digress.
On the contrary, with men I like the equal partner idea. In fact sometimes I prefer that the man in my life make more of the decisions with some input on my part. And because my older brother was the most influential male figure in my life, I think I tend to look for qualities in a man that remind me of him.He was always lovingly positive with me,compassionate, understanding and had a vibrant passion for life.
My father,on the other hand, was very withdrawn, and stoic in nature. He evoked fear mostly. Though we as his children all loved so many of the qualities of my father's character. SO to get to the point, I decided to make an effort to date more "age appropriate" men. I wanted to prove to myself, I think, that there was nothing really wrong with my psyche. That my choices were pure of heart and not derived from the fear of being over controlled, losing my identity to a man closer to my own age.
I met M on a dating website that was free to women.
Why not? Post a picture and a profile then scroll through online profiles looking for people of common interests and like mindedness. M's picture portrayed a man who seemed confident in stature and demeanor,well dressed and still looking well for his years. I found his picture and his smile appealing. His profile didn't go off on a wild tangent about owning half of the Roman Empire and driving a Lamborghini and a Mercedes. It didn't mention his distaste for his ex-wife or list one hundred and one things he was looking for in a woman. He didn't seem to be looking for Barbie and his interests of music,travel,nature, with no drama, were reassuring. He had been married and divorced with kids, so no fear of commitment as he did state he was very much involved still in his kids lives. They were both in college. He didn't list as his idea of travel a trip to the lake with his dingy, or four wheeler and a six pack as his weekend diversion,,, not that there is anything wrong with that, ;-) just not my idea of travel.
So when I noticed he had listed me as a "favorite" which those of you who know Internet dating is a sign that he had marked my profile to his little black book but had not contacted me. So he was showing interest but hadn't yet had the balls to really write or even wink ;-) to me..or maybe he was just getting out of a relationship and fantasizing or just using my picture as a visual stimulus for self pleasuring.
I decided to think the better of him and send him an email. He responded and quickly commented that he would like to chat on the phone. After a few conversations during which he answered my subtly investigative security check questions without a glitch, I decided to meet him for in public for a drink.
He was as his picture had portrayed an attractive man. Our conversation flowed. He didn't order too many drinks and get totally inebriated. On the down side, he never asked if I would like an appetizer or another drink, I had to ask for another drink myself but he insisted that the waitress bring out the "FREE" chips. He asked first to make sure that they were in fact "free." He was otherwise respectful and polite to me and to the waitress, and with two kids in college and just a first meeting I over looked the "free chips only" thing. Maybe I was desperate to make age appropriate man thing work.
He walked me to my car, and deciding that this might be a man I would like to date and get to know better, I did not put myself out there in any overtly flirtatious way.
I was a lady. Cool, calm and collected, I said a sweet "good night" and told him that I would look forward to hearing from him when he promised to call.
There seemed to be a mutual attraction on some level. On my way home I made the usual call to my bff to give her the details. It was all positive.
After a few days,,, the three day rule apparently applied with this man, he asked where I would like to go to dinner. Suggesting that I choose a favorite and "romantic" place to sit and chat over a glass of wine or drinks. Bingo! There was an attraction, or at least he was willing to put in an effort to get laid.
Nice though, I thought. Once again keeping in mind that the man was supporting two college age kids I immediately went from the 4 star list to something less pricey. But when he then insisted that he would "surprise" me. I was even more delighted. Most women, at least this woman enjoys surprises of this kind so I left the restaurant choice to him, and because I knew him only a short time and he was dropping his kids at the airport told him I would meet him wherever. His choice was one of my favorite resorts, and a restaurant I had been to once or twice before for brunch and lunch.
I dressed appropriately in a not too short black pencil skirt and a rather conservative but very feminine flowing blouse from The White and Black Store. I applauded myself on the way to meet him, I was finally,,, finally dating a man close to my age who was interesting, charming and with whom I felt I had some chemistry.
I arrived and valet parked as is usually my habit when it is dark and the walk from the parking lot in the dark is less safe. Walking into the lobby and down the stairs of the lush Hyatt property, I felt very much like a woman who had over come her apprehensions and was ready to meet a man who might turn out to be more then casual fun. I felt good.
Sometimes things aren't what they seem.
As I glanced through the restaurant and all its tables inside and out, I didn't see him. Perhaps I was early. Looking at my watch, no, I was a few minutes late. Maybe he was late, the airport and all. I chose to use my cell phone to call him.
"Hi,I've just arrived are you here yet? I've looked and I don't see you."
Reply: "Yes, I am here and after all the trouble I've gone through to pick this place you can try harder to find me!"
Whoops! HMMMM.... OOOOOKAY....so I thought at first that he was kidding,that his abrupt tone was a joke.At least I was still hopeful.
"OK," I said, "well if you give me a clue I'll find you faster."
"I'm on the out most patio." he said." Look and you'll find me."

It was a beautiful night and a beautiful place. The Hyatt at Gainey has a tropical feel and in the cool evening air with the scent of fresh flowers I wasn't going to let his "joke" worry me. He had been interesting, personable. Let it go, I told myself.
As I approached him he seemed to hold back a smile, kissed me lightly on the cheek. I told him that he looked handsome and he didn't say anything.
Perhaps the kids I thought.
We were shown to our table and the conversation seemed labored. He wasn't drinking. He announced that he had gone to one of the clubs I had mentioned I sometimes went to the night before looking for me, but I wasn't there. He had drank too much there and was not going to drink at all tonight. Darn... A drink might have chilled him out.
When I reminded him that I had told him I was visiting my female friend that night to watch a chick flick he scowled.
OK... then !!! Well !!!
Then to my amazement he looked up at me and asked,"So are we seeing each other exclusively now?"
Turning a whiter shade of pale,I'm sure, I cleared my throat and said."How could we be seeing each other exclusively when I have only known you, actually had conversation with you face to face for about 2 and half hours?"
His response," Well I hope you know I don't take everyone here. In fact, have you been here before because I have never brought anyone here and I have never come here on my own."
"Well, yes."
I explained how it was a favorite place of mine and though not every week but at least often enough I had come with friends, alone and once on a date for brunch. I thanked him for making such a thoughtful choice.
At this point his phone rang, and saying it was his ex he picked it up,somewhere in the middle of a long conversation with her, I excused myself to the ladies room to give him some privacy.
I took a long time. He was still on the phone when I returned. Then said good bye to her and turned to me with no apology... "Let's go for a walk."
The walk led to a bridge overlooking the lawn and the pool area. The lighting was soft, the stars out.
I wanted to go home.
Now here is where I was very stupid. I was horny and I was annoyed. I no longer wanted to date men my age...EVER ! He was a jack ass. I had asked all the appropriate "Is everything, OK?" trying to figure out his mood and trying very hard to find excuses for his rude behavior. Oh, did I mention when the bill came he let me know it was more expensive then he had expected, and my dinner was the reason. He had had a dinner salad, all he would ever eat in a "place like that."
Lord help me.!
But right there on that bridge as he pulled me into him telling me what great tits he imagined I had, I decided I was going to sleep with him and then toss him back.
I am not always the brightest or wisest woman around.
I wanted to get laid. He was there and I was going to get what I wanted.

OK so, here's where the calculating ,mind of a woman clicks in.

I press my body against his but feeling nothing, I ran his hand down the front of my blouse and then up my thigh but ruthlessly stop him midway to paradise.
I whisper in his ear that I had forgotten to put my panties on and after all we can't do IT here. He invited me to his home.
A modest but nicely decorated place in the McDowell Mountains, it takes me one sip of a drink and about five minutes to get him into the bedroom. The button of my blouse strategically unbuttoned as he poured the drink.
He quickly began explaining about how he had "problems" and would never be able to keep a woman like myself satisfied. I didn't say a word because he rushed to lick my thighs and then finding his way quickly to my clitoris he began to lick and suck with great joy and enthusiasm. I rewarded him with verbal praise then begged to get my hand on his cock. And there it was,,, small,and limp.
OK so he needs more stimulation no problem,,, lick it, suck it, talk dirty to him, reassure him. NOTHING.
Hey, it's OK these things happen.
"No," he said, "this happens to me all the time. This is how I am. This is what happens. I can't get it hard."
I had not had an orgasm, though he had gotten me close with his tongue.He obviously was not having anything, except some pleasure in my naked top and my skirt pulled up to my waist. Staring down at me he repeated "I cannot ever have a woman like you."
Now despite his previous behavior at the resort, I began to feel sorry for the man. And sorry is not a good thing to feel when you are in bed with someone.
I kissed his forehead gently,stroked his hair and told him, " Look I don't mean to insult you but you obviously are struggling with this, have you asked your doc about Viagra?" "Yes," he replied..."It's just NOT the right time."
NO SERIOUSLY that's what he said.
"Right time???" I questioned.
"Yes" he said," I won't take that until I am much older. It's not the right time for VIAGRA."
M rubbed as hard as he could against me. He even tried to have me help him to get that now wet, limp, thing into me.
It was like trying to get a wet noodle into the neck of a wine bottle. As much as you try, it just ain't happening!
I left M's house that night,quietly, trying not be rude and rush out the door.
All I thought about for weeks was that limp noodle and my throbbing vagina waiting, hoping beyond hope that by some miracle,,,some little blue miracle pill,perhaps it could work.
But, it just wasn't time for Viagra.
I believe we all have our own process, and it is not my place to try to change a man in any way. I wish M well, despite his rude behavior and inappropriate assumption that relationships become exclusive in under 3 hours. I have run into him twice but we have not spoken.I did not want to embarrass him further.He is not a bad human being. But I say this with encouragement for anyone reading this ever having a similar circumstance. ASK your doctor... maybe it IS time for Viagra.!
And to the women who have been similarly frustrated... My relief came not with my hand held shower massage, but with the very next man who I invited to share my bed.
Everything worked exceptionally well... the memory of "wet noodle man" faded, and I was smiling again, especially when I look up in my kitchen at my clock with its little blue pill hands and straight up arrows.
Life is funny. Life is GOOD !